:: My Reality ::
:: Friday, March 28, 2003 ::
Now I'm Wearing: Bright yellow button down with thin white stripe, khaki colored braces (suspenders), dark red Ziggerat tie with kind of light gold highlights...goes with the braces just fine. Still same Navy cotton trousers, navy hose. Don't ask about the shoes, they look like clown shoes and totally spoil the look. I have my shoes off right now, just my stocking feet (lunch time, door closed).
Seeing: Silver Sky Sparkles with occasional tracers.
Told Dale about the Taylor. Told him I was never meant to have it. All along it was part of one of my scams and it just didn't work out. I always said that I didn't deserve the Taylor. Now I'm guitarless, but not for long. One will come by with my name on it soon.
Sure miss seeing Gina's posts. She's a Gee Taw blogger buddy possessing a high intellect and a shart wit. She explained to me what happened and I totally understand. Still I miss her. Gina's Blog is posted as a favorite on the left column. BTW I reworked the Bridge in "A Girl I Used to Know"...goes like this:
Your name's tattooed upon my arm
inside a broken heart
That's faded and worn
It's there to show
A girl I used to know
From a long time ago.
Made a few other changes and it's turned into a fine ballad. Dale seems to like it. As soon as I get my act together I will post a few wave files, including that bridge. Also the intro to Suzanne...spectacular! Remember, Friday afternoon. I've already seen and heard the clutches start to gather. People are cleaning up their desks, Yeah that's hard, Right, Making their to-do lists for Monday, another mind tangler, but pretty soon smiles will break out and the conversations will go up a few decibels, laughter will be heard in place of keyboard chatter. People will start making goofy faces and goofier happy hour plans. Burgeoning Office Romances will either advance or painfully subside.
Meanwhile my wife, who has admitted to me that she's horney, has already gotten off early and called in sick to her second job. Plans to be a night of delight!
:: Tom 2:29 PM [+] ::
...Wearing: Navy cotton trousers (with a crease) and burgundy tee (casual Friday).
Listening to: Nothing, Stereo still broken!
Meds: Fresh batch, brand this time- no generic stuff.
Yea Friday, As the US Govt. grinds to a halt at about 2:00, people visiting other's cubes, people laughing in the hallways. Me, I'm pretty much alone, noone to visit. Lots of times I just leave for an hour. And then, when I come back, it's almost time to go. Oh well. I know all you right wing idealogues would have a field day with this but down deep you're just jealous that you don't have a cushy job like this one. Oops, got to go, I have a meeting at 9:00!
:: Tom 8:55 AM [+] ::
... :: Thursday, March 27, 2003 ::Wearing: Baby blue Henley and faded olive cotton trousers.
Meds: Celexa 40mg, Adderall 40mg, Triflouperazine 10mg
Voices: Singing this morning
Listening to: A recording of my old Martin DM which sounds pretty damn good. Has that woody midtone and sparkling treble.
Learning: You don't have to have the best sounding guitar in the whole wide world to have people love you.
Missing: Pam & Don McMahon on their farm in NC, Dale in Burbank, all my old friends, all my new friends. I need to reconnect.
:: Tom 9:28 AM [+] ::
... :: Wednesday, March 26, 2003 ::New Life Day #10:
I'm gonna grab today by the short ones and give it all it can handle! No more goofing off till 11:00 then taking lunch till 2:00! I'm going to do some work, Sucka'! As a matter fact I've already knocked two items off my task list and it's not even ten o'clock. I need to add to my todo list...maybe walk down to the third floor and do some file structure interviews. I'll be sure to make a great impression in my: Forrest green paisley button down and khaki cotton trousers (my favorite outfit, favorite color combination). On the way to work this morning the car radio was not working (electrical problem) so I sang "What Happened to my Lonely Slice of Life" and "Crossing Over," both of which are my songs (so sad about the Taylor...I played a D-35 yesterday which had that pure Martin Resonance and woody tone that I like so much. I played "One Dime Blues" and kept the octive E alternating bass line going just for the sure joy of hearing the woody thunder of the Martin. But it lacks the sparkle and power of the Taylor. As Roo said, "Talk Gee-Taw to me!" I could talk Gee-Taw all day to Roo!).
:: Tom 10:02 AM [+] ::
... :: Tuesday, March 25, 2003 ::Wearing: Navy knit polo and khaki slacks, brown Rockports
Listening to: An awful song going through my head after being reminded of it on Womanchild's site.
The wife and I survived another crisis this past weekend, putting it all back together, patching things up. Looks like the financial pressure will be easing in another month. She's definitely changing jobs and that's going to take a lot of stress off her. Meanwhile I just can't believe the blessing that has been bestowed upon me: I have my sanity back!!! Despite lots of self made stress, I still have my chin up, face forward, and reality squarly sitting upon my shoulders. I'm not overcome with delusions and pain. I am wrenching the last vestages of symbolic paranoia from my consciousness. I'm getting ready to quit one therapist, keeping the good Doctor as my Meds Guru. The therapist was sweet, God Bless her. She taught me how to deal with my different parts through cognitive therapy. But I'm pretty much all fixed up now. "And to all the fucked up people, in the whole wide Universe, You're bound to hear the sounds of Freedom Flashing." Sing it Bob!
:: Tom 12:47 PM [+] ::
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